15 February 2012

Whining and...Grace

I just now realized the serious irony of my last two posts. Talking about that book I just read with the promising title {Say Goodbye to Whining?} and then stories of my whiny two year old. Well. The book doesn't mention having to say goodbye to whining more than once, but I imagine that's what the author meant. There's no quick and easy fix.

I've been telling Ezra {in my more firm and controlled moments} -- "I don't like a whiny voice. Can you ask nicely?" and he does sometimes make a pretty decent tone-of-voice shift to happier and more polite. He's working on it. The hardest thing for him right now is trying to get a turn with something. He has developed quite a desperate cry/whine/chase his brother down while jumping and reaching for whatever it is he wants. But brother's arm is longer.

He is supposed to say, "may I have a turn please?" And of course then brother has been instructed to take the initiative to problem solve. And sometimes it's alright for big brother to say "no, not right now....I'll give you a turn soon" and Ezra needs to say "OK Peter". And not throw a fit.

Did you write all that down, mom? You're gonna have so much fun with these two while I'm gone to Africa. ;)

Speaking of whining, the blog has been quiet and might remain so because I haven't had a lot of good things to say. I'd like to keep my writing positive and uplifting, helpful even, but sometimes life's realities are fairly raw and depressing. Well, just the way I'm looking at things, I suppose. Humbug.

Life just throws me for a loop sometimes. And it's usually smarter to not over-think it all. It passes.

My husband was a good listener tonight. He had some helpful things to say too.

Sometimes I just can't figure out how to make life work -- work like I want it to. Balanced. Fun. Extraordinary. Brilliant.
A few more hours of sleep would probably help.

Yesterday I fell asleep in the school room on the floor, with Ezra leaning on me, playing Angry Birds on my phone. At some point, I moved to my bed in a haze and slept some more. Then woke briefly to the sound of Peter talking on the phone. {Later I got a voicemail from the church member and friend, saying how nice it was to talk to Peter...}

We played outside a bit this morning -- it was sunny and sorta warm. I enrolled Peter in tree climbing 101. He was scared, but managed to walk down a tree limb, across a creek and back. I jumped across the creek and wrenched my back a bit. Getting old. Waaaah. Seriously, why am I so tired? Why can't I do simple things that I used to do?

And so it is with apologies that I start and end this post with references to whining. And I promise to perk up and get more rest and tend my sore arm and not have any scary dreams about airplanes and not write any more run on sentences or fragments. LOL

You know what?? I'm not done.

What I need to learn is to have grace for myself and grace for others. I've decided that this is a big enough deal that I'm going to focus on it all year. Grace for the days of the month when everything falls apart. Grace for the little annoyances of life. Grace for humanity around me, none of which have reached perfection, all of which need my grace as much as they need the Father's. Grace for my faults, thrown up in my face sometimes. Grace for my family. It's also known as unconditional love. Something I desperately need to learn more about.

OK. I think I'm finished.